In a world where portals bend the fray,
Splitgate, a game of modern day.
Where warriors through rifts do leap,
Tactical paths, they craft and keep.
With guns ablaze and movement bold,
Through gates of light, their fates unfold.
In arenas, where time and space bend,
Skill and wit, our champions commend.
A dance of bullets, a flash of light,
In every portal, a fierce fight.
This game of skill, where heroes gate,
A battleground of destiny's slate.
Let us toast to Splitgate's great corridors,
A tale of battles, forevermore.
Where each portal, a new path winds,
In this game's realm, where strategy finds.
The Angry Troll
Splitgate, huh? More like 'Split-brain.' It's what happens when Portal meets Halo in a low-budget crossover no one asked for. You get these portals, right? Novel idea, if it wasn't lifted straight from a game that did it a decade ago. And the shooting? If I wanted generic sci-fi pew-pew, I'd dust off my old Xbox and play some real Halo. The whole experience is like eating store-brand cereal – looks kinda like the real deal, but tastes like disappointment. Innovation is apparently creating a wormhole to 2010. Not exactly the leap forward they think it is.