Splatoon 3 Waystone

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Splatoon 3 Canon

Release Date: 09/09/2022

Developer: Nintendo | Publisher: Nintendo

Genres: Action Multiplayer Online Game Third-Person Shooter

Platforms:

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Melodies & Mockeries


Behold, High Ground Gaming's resident trolls! The cheerful Gurg and the irritable Grundle — together they bring songs of praise and mutterings of discontent about Splatoon 3.

Gurg
The Jolly Troll
In a realm where color reigns supreme,
Splatoon 3 paints a vibrant dream.
Inklings and Octolings, bold and bright,
Clash in battles, a chromatic fight.

With splattershot, brush, and roller's sweep,
They color the world, a canvas deep.
In Turf Wars waged, in Anarchy Battle's hold,
Stories of valor and daring told.

From Splatlands to lands anew,
They paint their tales in every hue.
In squid form swim, in kid form stride,
In this dance of tide and dye.

So sing a song of ink and sea,
For Splatoon 3, where spirits free,
Dance in hues of endless play,
In this vibrant, splashing fray.
Grundle
The Angry Troll
Splatoon 3? It's the same old splat in a new bucket. You'd think with a sequel, they'd innovate, but nope, they just repackaged the old mess. The color palette is as inspiring as a wet newspaper, and the gameplay has the depth of a kiddie pool. Running around, shooting ink? I've had more complex battles with my printer. And don't get me started on the 'strategy' – if I wanted to see pointless splattering, I'd just uncap a pen and shake it violently. Let's just say watching paint dry on a humid day would be better than this. At least that would end eventually!

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